tisdag 12 maj 2015

The myth of perfection - sewing and anxiety

Lauren at Wearing History wrote a blog post about how we tend to put forward our best sides in social media. That can be quite understandable, but also have its downsides: it is easy to compare one's reality with the polished surface other shows. That definitly is something I can relate to - one important reason that I started this blog was that I wanted to se what my "polished surface" would look like, so I could compare that instead of my real messy sewing reality to other people's work. ( A better idea migth be to learn not to compare myself to others, but that is slightly more of a long-term project, and it is fun to have a blog). Lauren isssued a challenge: show the reality behind some photos! I will generally keep my private life out of the blog, as it is a costuming blog and I don't think my private life is relevant, and I want some privacy for the non-costuming part of my life.  Leimomi Oakes at The Dreamstress wrote a very interesting post on balancing reality, privacy and seeing things from the positive side. Here, I will make an exception to my privacy ideas, as it is a good cause, and because I think feeling bad psycically is something we very often do not talk about. 

This outfit was completed unusually fast for me, but not for a positive reason. During the beginning of last year, I was having a period of anxiety, worrying a lot. I had negative thoughts spinning around in my head, and had a hard time concentrating at work. I also got the idea that many things that I normally enjoy was a pointless or a waste of time, for example reading books or relaxing after work in front of a good TV series. That made me sew instead, in some idea that I had to make something useful. The worst day, I was not even sure there was any point in sewing, but I had to do something, so sewing it was. The dress was finished in a quick but not always enjoyable way.
It took me a while to find the courage to tell even my closest friends that I was feeling bad, beacuse I thought it was ridiculous and spoiled to not feel well when I had (and still has, of course) a wonderful husband, a good job and a nice apartment. Fortunately,  my wise family convinced me that it is ok to feel whatever way you feel, so I could accept it and begin working on how to get out of it.

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